I’ve now worked in public education for 12 years.  Prior to that, I attended one of the most prestigious public universities in the South.   And prior to that, I was a student for a full 13 years in public schools.  So, like most of my colleagues, I can tell you a thing or two about public education.

But after 29 years intimately involved in public education, and 34 years living amongst other human beings, I have to say… I think I missed out on some lessons.  In fact, I think I must have missed out on a hefty list of helpful classes.  I remember learning how to build a bomb in college Physics – which I never used.  I remember learning how to 3-point turn in Driver’s Education – and re-learning from my dad after I failed that portion of the driving test.  I remember learning how to balance an equation in Chemistry – hasn’t really helped my cooking.  I remember learning how to build a bridge out of toothpicks in Wood Shop – or maybe more how not to build a bridge out of toothpicks.  And I learned how to do a manicure in Home Economics – which, as it turns out, my grandmother was a much better teacher of.

So, as life has continued to progress, I’ve found myself wondering if there are some classes I’ve missed.  On some more relevant topics.  Because I’ve learned there’s a lot I need to learn how to do.  Some things I can Google.  That’s how I learned the best way to open a bottle of champagne.

But here are a few courses I would like to have taken, had they been offered, and of which are not necessarily Google-able.

How To Know If Your Dog Is Getting Too Lonely At Home

How To Eat Just Enough That Your Family Doesn’t Think You’re Starving Yourself, But That You Can Also Fit Into Your Pants

How to Politely Turn Down Hugs, When You Really Just Want To Be Alone

How to Politely Request Company, When Everyone Is Busy

How To Actually Know When To Hold ‘Em, Fold ‘Em, Walk Away, & Run

How To Manage Your iPhone Storage Settings When You’ve Done All The Suggestions Already

How To Judge a Man’s Character By His Online Dating Profile

How To Sit At a Bar and Have a Beer Alone Without Anyone Talking To You

How To Grocery Shop For One With A Smidgen of Integrity

How To Keep In Touch With Everyone That You’re Supposed To Keep In Touch With

How To Have a Repairman In Your House Without Mentally Scrolling Through All The Horrible Scenarios That Could Happen…

How To Negotiate With Salesmen When You’re a Woman, and They’re Judgey

How To Make the House You Built Together Not Feel Like a Mausoleum

How To Evenly Apply Sunscreen To Your Back When You Go To the Beach Alone

How to Survive Wedding Anniversaries Without Living In a Past That No Longer Exists

How To Separate Logic From Emotion

How To Know When The Best Time Is to Deal With…

• Your Late Husband’s Clothes
• Your Late Husband’s Cell Number
• Your Late Husband’s Facebook Account
• Your Late Husband’s Diplomas
• Your Late Husband’s Books
• Your Late Husband’s Apple Account

How To Not Feel Guilty About a Promotion You Didn’t Ask For

How To Be There For All Of Your Friends Every Time They Need You

How To Move Forward Without Relying On Wine

How To Know When You’ve Crossed a Line…Before You Actually Cross It

How To Be Tough Without Being Called the “B” Word

How To Let Your Married Friends Know How Blessed They Truly Are, Without Telling Them Every Time You Think It

And last, but certainly not least…

How To Gently Let Everyone Know… That You Are Dating

I’m sure there is some sage advice out there that others can offer.  I’m sure there are books that can provide a little guidance.  But, like most people, I’m just another human being looking for a step-by-step guide of how to navigate the path I’ve been given.  And on my particular path, these courses would be helpful to my individual needs.

I guess, like most things, I’ll problem-solve and figure it out as I go.  And, hey, if nothing else…

…mistakes are proof that I’m trying.